So today I was attending this training on health and safety. Quite informative I must say. I leant how to fight fire and the different contents in a fire extinguisher and the type of fires they extinguish.Good stuff. Only problem I had was with the facilitator.
He was a man for sure but he had done his eyebrows. I couldn’t keep my eyes off his face, his eyes to be precise. He looked perfectly ridiculous with his overly arched eyebrows. My eyes followed his face whichever way he turned as he was delivering his presentation. I was having this passive one-sided conversation with him in my head. With me doing all the talking and him not having any idea of what I was saying. Did he actually get his eye brows threaded or tweezed? Did he get it done at a salon or by himself? I found this very amusing and would find myself smiling and Mr. Eyebrows man would smile back assuming that I was a diligent student understanding every word about fire.
They had not been tweezed I was sure they had been trimmed and shaped with a razor blade. The small hairs growing around the arch of his eyebrows gave him away.
Well I maybe I am old fashioned and shady but a man with shaped eye-brows? I don’t know about that. I have no idea what to think of that either.
Does Mr. Eyebrows man have a wife, a sister, any living relative? What is their take on his well-shaped eyebrows? Does he live alone? I hope so. No self-respecting person can let their male family member walk around town with thinly shaped eyebrows. If my brother did his eyebrows how would I feel? This was a very hard concept for me to visualize so I would rather not bother.
Oh my goodness does he have children? Does he have daughters? Do they do their eyebrows as well? Is it like a family thing where husband, wife and two daughters named Philomena and Agrippina all trot into a beauty salon on a Saturday afternoon to get their brows done?
Would you consider Mr. Eyebrows man less of a man? I glanced at my colleague Onsare who always insists he is a natural man. A real man. A total man who never uses deodorant and smells natural (read strong sweat that makes your eyes tear). But Onsare was busy scribbling something on his notepad maybe taking notes on fire and safety or writing down a shopping list. No not a shopping list since he says real men don’t do shopping so most likely he was taking notes. I glanced around at the eyebrows of all the men in the room. Unkempt bushy eyebrows actually look manly and nice. So who advised Mr. Eyebrows man to do his eyebrows? Maybe the hairs got singed during a fire outbreak and being a fire marshal he lost hair trying to save people. How did the fire not burn his eyelashes? Maybe I should ask him.
I raised my hand slowly.
‘Yes madam do you have a question?’
‘Eye-brows, wondering if they have been shaped….’
‘I was wondering if they have a fire exit in this building?’